Friday, April 30, 2010

my sweet baby Coco.

Yesterday Coco was outside playing and wouldn't came back in. I worried all night because she is probably the hungriest kitty I know to go so long without eating. I don't know how many times I've seen her sprint from wherever she was when i would shake her lil' jar of food. But she wouldn't come in. With the little sleep that I got, I woke up as soon as the sun came up and went out this morning again but still couldn't find her. She's primarily an indoor cat, although because I know how much she loves rolling in the dirt and because she never goes too far from the driveway, I let her enjoy the backyard sun. I got her a cute lil' Coco tag too. But I was worried, so I made these flyers and put them in some of my neighbors mailboxes:

As I was going from mailbox to mailbox, a lady came up to me asking if I was looking for a cat. I told her yes and she said, "I hit her yesterday in my car. " my heart dropped. She asked to see my photos and said, "yes, that's her. She went under my car and didn't get hit by my tires, so I was going to take her in... but when I picked her up, she just died in my arms.." tears just starting streaming down my face and she held me. I was still hoping that maybe it wouldn't be her, but she unwrapped the towel and I saw my lil' Coco with her tag on. I carried her home, sobbing with my roommate at my side. I can't even explain what it's been like to lose two kitties in such a short span of time. They were my best friends. They kept me going everyday. They were always something to look forward to. My mom told me today, "It's nice to know that you have so much love to give to animals because they are so deserving of it and not everyone gives what you do. When you give your love to them, they will always be there for you too. " It was comforting to hear that.

I have a million photos of coco. we were supposed to stick together here. She was always sitting with me while I wrote here. I'm not going to change the name because she will be here in spirit! forever! Here are some photos I've never shared. Just a tiny glimpse of what I have..


she would drag all these toys onto my bed everyday. a pile of toys...

happily being pet by karen.

working with mama.

She was panting after running around. so funny!

I took this photo as part of my morning series of her paws, on April 15th.

She loved being outside, as I imagine all cats do, but she needed to be watched because she wasn't street smart.

what a pretty face.

She loved being in bags or boxes. More than any cat I know, she would just sit in it and watch everyone else in the room.

she always wanted down into the basement. she woudl beg to go down there. The other night mb & i heard a loud crash. We're still unsure of the damages. I think she liked to play fort.

miss cute face.

new toy.

I just bought her this mouse. She LOVED it!

she would always bite my toes. ha. this was a couple weeks ago. I wanted to get an in-focus one but it tickled too much.

model kitty.

these are my last photos of coco, taken last sunday when I got home. She would run and look out the window when I pulled into the driveway, and then run to the door as I walked up. This time I teased her because she looked so cute with her little head peeking, and I happened to have my camera. So I kept her there, playing at the window and then she stretched her paws up on the window. what a sweetie.

I found coco 2 1/2 years ago when i was driving home and i saw her nearly get killed running under a truck. She ran to this building, pressing herself against it, her little 4 month old body shaking. I took her home and took care of her. mb and i loved her and spoiled her immensely. i feel like if you love someone, you should always spoil them and not feel one bit bad about it because they probably deserve it. I love you forever, my darling coco.


  1. you should spoil everyone in your life because no one knows how long you will have with them.
    your were such a good mommy to coco kitty. She had a short but happy life with you.
    I know you will save another kitty and give them the love and attention that they are longing for.

  2. i loved pulling up in your driveway and seeing coco in the window. i'll miss that! and she was lucky to have you. xo.

  3. Esme, I can't believe this! I was crying so much reading your post, I could barely see the pictures. This is too much loss to have in such a short amount of time. I am so, so sorry. I believe in spoiling with love too. I can tell you love your animals silly and from what it sounds like Coco had an amazing, happy, loving life because of you. Please don't loose that spirit. If there is anything I can do for you please let me know.

  4. So sad!!! I cried just reading this! What a sweet soul you are. xoxoxoxoxxo

  5. Esme these pictures are great, she was pretty expressive

  6. Dear Coco,

    I miss you. I wish you would be home later, sitting in the window when I pull up. I miss your soft fur, crazy desire for food and silly spirit. I see you in every box I pack and every grocery bag I leave on the floor. I am sorry that I didn't make you come inside that day. I love you.

    Mommy #2


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